Monthly Archives: November 2005

Hmmm …

I think this quiz should actually be called “To which race of Middle Earth would you like to belong, because, frankly, I know I’m more of a Hobbit than an elf. But like the best Hobbits, I aspire to elvishness.

Elvish

Information Overload

I made the mistake of going online to research gestational diabetes this morning. You’d think I’d know better by now, but my insatiable appetite for information got the better of me. I did find some decent sites, but only after slogging through several that were scary and anxiety-inducing. (“Gestational Diabetes is very serious!” “If you don’t follow this extremely restrictive plan you will injure your baby!!” “You better watch out! You’re at risk for every possible kind of health problem now!!”, etc., etc.) Gah. I set up the appointment with the diabetes clinic today – I’m starting out with a 2 hour long information session at the clinic on Thursday, followed up by a meeting with a nutritionist next week.

I gotta tell ya, internets, I’m feeling some trepidation. I’m essentially a lazy, lazy person, and from what I can tell, GD is not a lazy person’s disease. There’s a lot of monitoring and checking and rechecking and reporting. I have problems keeping track of my car keys, for chrissakes! I get lost in my own neighborhood. How the hell am I going to remember which carbs combine with which proteins at which time of the day? And while I can’t say I’ve really enjoyed food since I got knocked up, it still sucks major big rocks that I probably can’t have any refined sugar until May. I mean, hello! Thanksgiving! Christmas! Easter! Doing without mulled wine and hot cider alone should be enough to qualify me for some kind of lower level sainthood, but no gingerbread? No sugar cookies? NO CHOCOLATE BUNNY?!?!?!

But the worst part of all is the guilt. Because no matter how much I know that lots of non-obese women get GD, and lots of bigger women don’t get it, I still feel like I brought this on myself. I *meant* to lose weight before getting pregs. I knew I really needed to. I just got with child before I thought I would! And, yeah, I mean obviously no one would plan it this way, and I know there’s no point in even trying to place blame for stuff like this. Nonetheless, I feel like it’s something I could have controlled if I had more self-control. In other words, this is feeding into an entire lifetime of guilt and discomfort about my eating habits. So in addition to the physical discomforts, there’s this whole range of psychological discomforts I get to experience. This is not fun.

Meh. OK. Enough moping. Let’s squab it up and think of some silver linings here, people:

1. I have really good docs, blessedly un-condescending and highly supportive and common-sensical.

2. More ultrasounds! More getting to see the baby before it’s born!

3. More exciting blog entries! I could have just stuck you with a regular ol’ pregnancy, but no! I know your time is limited, your attention spans are short – you want more bang for your blogging buck, dammit, and I support that! High-risk is the only way to go!

4. Fodder for future guilt trips! Forget that tired old, “I was in labor for X hours with you” excuse, and bring on the power of “I risked a fatal condition for you!” or “I gave up sugar for 6 months!” or “I felt nauseated for the better part of a year!” That’s your A-game, guilt-wise.

Or, in other words, what’s that you’re whistling and why is it so dark in here?

Well, GREAT.

So. I have gestational diabetes. Fuckin’ right on. I didn’t even pass the fasting blood test – meaning that even when I hadn’t eaten anything in 11 hours, my blood sugar was still above the normal range. Normally they don’t even do this test until 28 weeks, but my docs wanted to get me in early for it, and I guess it’s a good thing they did. I’ll find out more about how this all works when I visit the diabetes specialists at the hospital early next week, but for now it looks like it will be managed with diet rather than insulin shots, which is good. Of course, I’ll still have to make like a pincushion and poke myself multiple times per day to check my blood sugar, so that will be super fun. Sigh. Onward and upward.

Grrrrrrrrrr

Had my monthly checkup this morning. Heard Hoss’ heartbeat, which was nice and strong; I’ll be getting a “level 2” ultrasound in a couple of weeks (this is a special targeted ultrasound that I get to have because my aunt was born with hydrocephaly. Just means they look for specific markers to make sure the baby is developing normally.) So all that was fine and good.

But the rest of the appointment …

For most of my life, I’ve had low-to-normal blood pressure. Even as I’ve struggled with weight issues, my blood pressure has typically stayed pretty low. However, about a month and a half into my first trimester, my blood pressure started creeping up. And it’s only gotten worse in the intervening time. (Currently it’s averaging about 150+/90+, as compared to “normal” 120/80.) There is a condition called gestational hypertension, where the increased bloodflow triggers high blood pressure. But that shows up in the second trimester, not the first. So as far as my doctors can figure out, what I have is regular ole hypertension that just happened to show up after I got knocked up. Cuz I’m lucky like that. Anyway, the fun part is that hypertension puts you at much greater risk for fun things like preeclampsia, where your body starts to reject the fetus and if you aren’t careful you can die and stuff. So my doctors are understandably concerned about the blood pressure issue, and are trying to keep a very close eye on it. Part of this means that I “get” to go into the doctor’s office more often than I would otherwise, which as an attention-grabbing Leo I don’t mind too much. And I’ll probably have more ultrasounds than most expectant moms as well, which isn’t bad. But it also means I have to do really pain-in-the ass stuff like the 24-hour urine collection adventure that I’m currently engaged in.

24-hour urine collection, you say? Tell me more! Ok, ok. It works like this: the doctor’s office sends you away with a big fat orange jug in which you have to collect every drop of pee you excrete for a 24 hour period. To aid in collection, they also give you this collection thingy that balances on the top of your toilet and looks like a combination between a bedpan and something they torture nursing home residents with. Plus you get a big white bag to cart it all around in. Then, every time you get the urge to go for the next 24 hours (which, when you’re pregs, is A LOT) you gather up all the equipment, pee in the container, pour it in the jug, rinse out the container, and put the jug in the fridge to prevent bacteria buildup. You can just IMAGINE how much fun this was to do at work today. Not only did I look like a total freakazoid carting a huge white carrier bag into the bathroom with me every time I had to go, but … um … we only have communal refrigerators at work. And I’m *pretty sure* most of my coworkers would be a little, um, nonplussed to find a large vat of urine sitting next to their yogurts and ham sandwiches. But it had to be refrigerated – so I wrapped the jug in about three Target plastic bags, and hid it in the bottom compartment of the least-used fridge on my floor. Hopefully no one got curious.

The second crummy thing about the appointment was that I failed my initial glucose-screening test, which is the first way they test you for gestational diabetes. Which means that I get to spend approximately 1/2 my day off tomorrow engaged in a 4-hour marathon version of the same test. I’m “high-risk” for gestational diabetes (read: fat) so I’m not really looking forward to tomorrow. If I really do have it, it will mean some major dietary changes and maybe even insulin shots. Bleh. I think I could cope with either hypertension OR gestational diabetes, but can I please please not have to cope with both? Please? If any of y’all know any normal blood-sugar spells or incantations, feel free to say them on my behalf.

And the third crummy thing about the appointment was that I’ve lost 4 pounds since I last went in. You’re not so much supposed to lose weight while you’re pregnant, as you are supposed to, you know, gain it. Doctors = not so much happy with that. Most of it, I think, was because I was on a crummy new acid reducing medication that was making me sick. as. a. dog. I’m off it now, so hopefully I can start putting a few pounds on (and you have no idea how weird it feels to say that), but the upshot is that I felt like pretty much a total failure at this checkup.

At least Hoss is OK. I mean, that’s what counts, right?

Random linkfest

Aka, I don’t have time to post anything substantive, so here are some fun/random/weird links:

– Some neuroscientists at Rutgers are helping paraplegic women regain the power to orgasm. Best quote: “There could be a blockbuster drug in this, he reasoned, if he could decode the neurobiology of female rat sex.” Hells, yeah! (via Twisty)

What Not to Crochet. Self-explanatory, really, but this picture says it all.

– Ever wondered where you could find a handy repository of all the movie posters from MST3K? Well, wonder no more!

Beedogs. I had no idea. (via Travis, who always finds the good weird stuff online)

Tuesday to do list

Go read this.

Then go buy one of these.

Because, really: anyone who can pick on the American Girls is just sad.

Commas are cool

I know Pam doesn’t like quizzes, but this one doesn’t demand any knowledge of Mayfair whatsoever. Enjoy.

comma
You scored 92% Sociability and 52% Sophistication!
You are happy around most people, and take pleasure in breaking large groups up into smaller, more managable units. This makes you something of a manager, though your subtlety makes it easy for others to overlook this aspect of your character. You are comfortable in most situations, and go about quietly being yourself even if there is chaos errupting all around you. The semicolon makes you a little nervous, but the semicolon makes everyone a little nervous.

This test tracked 2 variables.
How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 99% on Sociability
You scored higher than 39% on Sophistication

Link: The Which Punctuation Mark Are You Test written by Gazda on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Dilemma

Here’s a question for you to ponder: if I’ve been feeling especially sickish since the hurling episode on Wednesday, which explanation is less heinous?

A) I have or am getting some kind of flu (I vote avian!)

B) I’m one of those lucky, lucky women that starts to get really sick in the second trimester.

Much as I absolutely, positively hizzate the flu, I’m sort of plumping for option A.

(Sorry posting has been so insubstantial lately – just feeling kind of run down. But I’m finishing a pregnancy book that should result in a more interesting post later this week.)

Sweet relief

The show is up. Opening night went very well, with a good audience and a nice reception afterwards. Now I can finally relax a little. Tonight’s plan: let my assistant director take care of the show, go home, get into my PJs, and curl up with either a cozy book or a cozy movie. Most of which I will sleep through. Or, as my friend Rebecca put it, “I’m going to happy hour, and you’re going to be pregnant.”

Well, check off another pregnancy milestone

Last night, in the throes of my usual indecision as to what I could stomach for supper, I decided that a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a glass of milk would hit the spot.

Unfortunately, Hoss decided that the “spot” it would hit was the commode, as I violently heaved up the entire meal some 15 minutes after I’d eaten it.

Bonus: my entire face is now covered with splotches of broken blood vessels, making me look like I’ve either just been crying or have some exotic melanin-enhanced disease. And just in time for opening night!

Truly, a precious time in my life.