Look, howsabout I just repost this? It’s pretty much exactly what I’d write today, anyway. Only moreso.
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Monthly Archives: August 2008
Same shit, different pregnancy
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Posted in trials and tribulations
Tagged first trimester
Hippo Birdie To Me
Today I am 37 years old. THIRTY-SEVEN, BITCHES. Sadly, my maturity level still hovers around 21. In celebration, Bubba has decided to make me extra nauseated today. Drugs, accupressure band, Preggie Pop drops – Bubba laughs in their faces. Personally, I’m not laughing so much. But hopefully I’ll feel better in time for the family cookout we’re having this afternoon. Because it’s my flipping BIRTHDAY, and I should be able to enjoy a fricking hamburger and some corn on the cob without my stupid fetus wrecking it for me!
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Posted in announcements, trials and tribulations
Random Tidbits of a Hatchling
1. Cute neologisms of late: “oinks” for coins, with which she is obsessed, “why herry” for library, and “pocksicca” for popsicle.
2. Last night, when I tried to come and sit close to the Hatchling and Mr. Squab, who were deeply engaged in conversation, the Hatchling bodily removed me from my chair, pushed me over to the other side of the room, and when I had the temerity to LOOK at them from my isolated position, held up her hand to me and said, “YOU: nonononononono!”
3. You have not really appreciated the full emotional range of “Sing, Sing a Song” until you have heard the Hatchling’s rendition. Sure, enunciation is not her strong point, but girlfriend FEELS the song. There are heartfelt gestures. There are random Brooklynesque pronunciations (“siiiiiiing, sing a swooooonnnng …”). There are highs and lows, with a triumphant finish and plenty of self-applause. The kid knows from dramatical arts.
4. Representative episode: The Hatchling wakes up from a slightly truncated but perfectly acceptable naptime and starts calling MAMAAAA! MAMAAAAA! over the monitor. I go upstairs, open the door, and say, “hi, baby, did you have a good nap?” The Hatchling sits up, says “Well, yes [babblebabblebabblebabble] still tired.” I say, “you’re still tired?” She says “Yah,” and proceeds to lie back down, cover herself with her blanket, and close her eyes. AND STAY THERE FOR FIVE FULL MINUTES. I guess she just wanted some company for the final portion of the event.
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Really, I don’t think any context is necessary
MR. SQUAB: You’re living in the past.
ME: I’ll tell you what. You let someone wax your balls and THEN I’ll let someone wax my hoo-hah.
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Posted in Funny Stuff, random tidbits
Nausea update in which I swear a lot and abuse the all caps key
Nausea medicine is a Good Thing. The stuff I’m on, Reclan, while it doesn’t make me feel *completely* normal, still has gotten me back to functionality, which is wonderful. I was talking to my sister about this (she has a new blog! Go read! Maybe then she will post more!) and we were trying to figure out why the hell I didn’t get on medicine the last time around, and equally, why the hell it took her several months to get on the meds herself. Some of it, no doubt, is due to the diffidence on the part of OBs everywhere towards prescribing unnecessary meds in the first trimester. Which, OK. I get that. But let me be the first to tell you: this shit is NECESSARY for some of us. I think last time I wasn’t clear enough about just how sick I was, because this time I basically went in and said: I’m so nauseated I can’t function. Give me some meds. And I got some, easy as that. But ALSO, I Blame the Patriarchy. By which I mean, the whole screwed up culture around pregnancy and childbirth and what’s “normal” and “natural” etc., etc. Both sis and I agreed that if we heard ONE MORE person tell us “oh, the sicker you are the healthier the baby is!” we were going to SPEW ALL OVER THEIR FEET. I mean, that may be true and everything, but WTF? Is that supposed to make me feel better? Like, oh, well, if it means that the baby is healthy then I don’t even MIND not being able to care for my 2 year old – in fact I’d do a little dance of joy if I could, you know, get up off the couch and/or stop feeling like crawling into a corner and dying. I mean, come the hell on. And all those books and websites that wax lyrical about how “natural” all these hellish symptoms are. Again, like that’s going to make you feel better. Well, let me be the first to say FUCK THAT. Lots of things are “natural” – stomach flu, the bubonic plague, and ebola come to mind – but you’re not going to frown on someone for treating THOSE symptoms. As my sister said, the baby is still getting the benefit of all those hormones, but with the medicine they can have those benefits without making me feel like life is overrated. Ergo: Good Thing. Q.E.D.
However, that being said, I do have to take issue with the universe for one thing about these anti-nausea meds: almost all of them have constipation as their main side-effect. Which is funny (really, can’t you hear me laughing?) because pregnancy also has that as a main side-effect, and even MORE hilariously, you know what, besides pregnancy, makes you feel nauseated? CONSTIPATION. Christ. So I’ve started taking a fiber pill every time I take an anti-nausea pill, and eating cereals so crammed with bran that I may start neighing and jumping fences any minute now. I’m also wearing my fancy acupressure bracelet at night instead of taking pills, just to give my system a break. This probably sounds like a lot of hassle, and indeed it is, but it’s so much better being less sick, I’m willing to do whatever it takes.
However, this baby better be a damn good one.
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Posted in trials and tribulations
Tagged first trimester
We are not enjoying two and a half
I remember at the first ECFE class I took with the Hatchling, the parent coordinator talked to us about how babies and toddlers go through regular fluctuations between equilibrium (when their brains are relatively calm, their skills are somewhat in synch with their desires, etc.) and disequilibrium (when their brains are on fire with learning new things and their desires outpace their skills, etc.) Apparently for most kids, the equilibrium is strongest around birthdays, and the disequilibrium is strongest around half birthdays.
The Hatchling is two years and five months old.
Gone are the days when her brief forays into tantrum-land could be interrupted with the distraction of a toy, a treat, a silly dance, or, god help me, the TV. Now, the most we can hope for is prevention, because once she goes to that tantrumy place, there is nothing on this earth that can snap her out of it before it has run its course. Don’t even bother talking to her: the only response you’ll get is “NOOOOOOOOO!” whether or not that’s an appropriate answer to whatever you’ve just said. This evening, which was a gorgeous preview of early autumn weather, we went to meet some friends at the Lake Harriet bandshell for a picnic dinner at the pops concert. It had all the makings of a perfect evening – and most of it was really, really nice – but then the Hatchling decided she was done with the picnic a little earlier than the rest of us, and that was it: we had to go. Well, that, or subject several hundred people to the ear-splitting cries of rage that only a 2.5 year old can produce. So Mr. Squab hauled her bodily off to the car, and I packed up our picnic stuff, apologizing to everyone all the while. Major drag, dude.
Of course, once we’d gotten her home and bathed, she was at her most adorable for the rest of the evening, singing along with songs before bed and telling us all about everything in her largely incomprehensible babble. Almost like she KNEW she’d pushed us almost to our limits …
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Wow.
I don’t know about y’all, but I thought the 2008 Olympics opening ceremony was PHENOMENAL. I’m a sucker for large-scale spectacle in general, so I always watch the opening ceremonies – plus they’re so interesting to analyze from a theatrical and political perspective – but I have to say, the Beijing show was maybe the best I’ve seen. Really amazing use of the human body to build a superhuman event. The globe at the end, in particular, was just mind-blowing. I could make a snarky comment right now about how it only makes sense that a militaristic communist country would be good at the grandiose nationalist displays, but I’m gonna keep it positive: it was a beautiful, artful, uplifting show. The Big Picture (via Q.)has a wonderful set of photos from the event if you missed it (or even if you didn’t).
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Posted in current events, Pop Culture
The newest member of the family
This is my new (to me) 2004 Honda CR-V. She is a beautiful red color, has a ton of cargo space, a roomy interior, and boasts many amenities my previous ride lacked, such as functional air-conditioning, a working radio, and a windshield without a crack going all the way across the middle, right at eye level. The sun roof and 6-disc CD changer are just gravy. In addition, she gets far better mileage than my ancient ’91 V-6 Toyota Camry ever did, and handles like a dream.
I call her Cherry Ames.
The Hatchling likes her, too.
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Posted in announcements, gear
This is what we call Not A Good Day
Today, we:
– confirmed that the brakes on my car are practically gone and it will cost $800+ to fix them
– decided that this means we need to get me a “new” car a little earlier than intended
– found out that our formerly diabetic cat is now suffering from thyroid disease
– which means more expensive treatments … for a 13 year old, never-really-been-healthy kitty
So: we’ve dropped a load of cash and are about to drop a whole lot more; I’m currently car-less, and the cat is looking pathetic.
Oh, and raccoons or squirrels have stolen all our gorgeous, ripening tomatoes, taken one bite out of them, and left them in our yard. Little bastards.
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Posted in trials and tribulations
Whew.
Sorry for the light posting lately. I’ve been cowering at home, positive that my ultrasound today would show a permanently deformed or even non-existent fetus. But all is well. There’s a real live shrimp in there, with a tail and little arm and leg buds and a yolk sac that looks like a thought bubble over its enormous (proportionally) head. No molar pregnancy. No twins (THANK YOU, JESUS). Anxiety is momentarily abated. Also, I got a prescription for anti-nausea medication, and lovely friend L. sent me a super-duper fancy wrist accupressure band (seriously – who has nicer friends than that?), so I’m officially declaring war on the sick feeling.
In other news, the Hatchling counted to 17 yesterday, and has started – completely uncoached, mind you – saying “Soooooo niiiiiiiiiiice” whenever she sees her father take his shirt off.
All is well.
